1. Honesty isn’t always the best policy
Interviewer: What’s your worst quality?
Candidate: I’m kind of unreliable!
Interviewer: I appreciate the honesty, but dude! You just lost your job!
Interviewer: Ok tell me why do you want this job?
Candidate: I want to gain experience and build connections with clients to start my own firm.
Interviewer: I admire your curiosity and skill, but have you heard of something called ethics?
Interviewer: Sorry, you are not qualified for this role.
Candidate: Can I see your CV to check if you are qualified enough to judge my abilities?
Interviewer: I’m sorry, You aren’t qualified for that either.
4. Can I ask you a question?
Candidate: Can I ask you a question?
Interviewer: Sure, go ahead
Candidate: How much does your organization pay you to do these interviews?
Interviewer: Whatever it is, I’m definitely charging more for handling you.
5. Real reason of taking a job
Interviewer: How badly do you need this job?
Candidate: Pretty badly; cigarettes are getting so very expensive
Interviewer: Yeah, you are right (sympathetically)!
6. I really need to know this about you
Interviewer: Is there anything else I should know about you?
Candidate: I oversleep and have trouble getting out of bed in the morning.
Interviewer: Is it! Good to know buddy! (Looks exasperated). You do know this job is in the morning shift, don’t you?
7. You see I know how to C
Interviewer: Do you know C?
Candidate: I don’t really know C, but I can fake it so the compiler thinks I do.
Interviewer: I like that; exactly what we want!
8. Seems like a good option!
Interviewer: Everything is fine…so, what do we do now?
Candidate: Table tennis?
9. Was waiting to ask this question
Interviewer: Do you have any questions?
Interviewer: Go ahead
Candidate: What if my degree turns out to be a fake in your background checks.
Interviewer: Hmm….you do know your way out, don’t you?
10. Hobbies and Interests
Interviewer: What are your hobbies?
Candidate: I am interested in tall corporate ladies!